A Day in My Life - A Little Baby Humor

!±8± A Day in My Life - A Little Baby Humor

Spoken Word Piece

I love him

I love him

I love him all the time,

but I like him when he's...

...asleep!

He's beautiful

He's beautiful

He's oh so beautiful to me all the time,

but he's absolutely gorgeous when he's...

...asleep!

yeah, I'm talking bout my baby,

my baby boy,

my little prince,

my inspiration,

my muse,

and the biggest pain in the butt I've ever seen in my life!

He's the smartest, sweetest, wittiest, funniest little dude I've ever met.

Got reasoning and deduction skills a lot of grown folks don't even possess.

And did I mention he's the biggest pain in the butt I've ever seen in my life?

I do believe it is my privilege to say what I want to say about him,

as long as I do what I'm supposed to do for him. To love, to nourish, and to nurture him.

You see, I love him more than words can explain.

I live for him, and I'd die for him.

I'd punch a big, bad monster in his eye for him.

I mean, he's my baby!

my heart,

my amazing and splendid gift from God.

And oh yeah, did I mention the biggest pain in the butt I've ever seen in my life?

You see, only a person who really loves someone can get away with saying something as crude as this and still have people understand how big the love is.

But make no mistake about it.

I'm the only one who can say these things.

"See, I's the one that birthed that baby!"

I was the one who was up all night,

sleep deprived, crazy, and looking a fright.

I was the one there with the runny noses,

the scrapes and bruises, the fevers,

the painful tooth buds,

and the nurses with the needles.

Heck, I breast fed him so long he was walking 'round talkin' bout,

"I want some momma nuke!"

couldn't say momma milk in the beginning,

so momma nuke just kinda stuck.

See, during the hours while he's awake,

I'm constantly talking and explaining,

correcting and persuading,

pleading and begging,

bargaining and threatening.

yelling and fussing,

spanking and sometimes even cussing...

....then embarrassed when I take him to his doctor's appointment,

we're sitting out in the lobby,

he picks up a half dragon, half donkey character from the movie Shrek

and says, "What the h#!! is this?!"

Uhh, my bad!

And no, I didn't spank him for that.

I quickly, but politely answered him, "That's a dronkey baby,"

so as to not give him the chance to ask that question again.

But on a more positive note,

I'm also singing and dancing

playing and laughing

story-telling and teaching

imagining and make-believing,

ABCing and 123ing,

I'm telling you, it can be quite overwhelming.

But when he slows down long enough to fall asleep,

and I can really see this little person whom I've co-created,

...actually see the work I've done,

I can see his beauty,

I can see his blessings,

I can see his purity and innocence,

And I can see his love, all magnified to the brillionth, billionth power.

And I think about all the sh*! we've been through on just that day alone.

Nothing seems as big or as bad as it did earlier.

I find my patience gets a little longer everyday.

I find that I'm not as quickly irritated as I was the day before.

And most importantly, I find myself realizing that I'm getting a little better at this motherhood thing every day that Jordan schools me.

And I look at him,

mouth slightly ajar,

light snore echoing in the background.

I see his chest rise and fall with perfect synchronicity.

I look at his belly button in awe of how it all began.

I marvel at this picture of pure perfection.

I see all that beauty and I realize...

Yeah, I love him all the time,

and like him when he's asleep,

but what I really and truly adore most is the moment he first opens his eyes in the morning.

And I say,

Thank you!

Thank you!

Thank you for my baby!

But awww shux,

here we go again!

A Day in My Life - A Little Baby Humor

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